GOP debate scheduled for 3 o’clock, by the flagpole

Semi-Colonial | Tom Smyth | March 3, 2016

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DETROIT– The upcoming Republican Presidential Debate has been scheduled for 3 o’clock, outside of school by the flagpole.  It appeared as though the debate was about to happen right in the middle of Ms. Thompson’s 3rd period class, but Donald, catching the eye of the teacher, told Marco to meet him outside by the flagpole after school.

Pundits are saying this was a smart move for Trump, who could be facing yet another call home to mom if the principal has to talk to him again.

This debate will surely address the ongoing conflict between the two.  On Monday, Donald got detention for stuffing Marco in a locker and in response Rubio told the whole school that Trump pees his pants.  Rubio has also been spreading rumors that Trump has been mean to Fox News’ Megyn Kelly because he has a crush on her and has been tormenting him for his “stubby little sausage fingers.”

In anticipation of the debate, Trump has been repeatedly staring at Rubio from across the room as he cracks his knuckles, inciting an exasperated gulp from Rubio.

Those hoping to view the debate can circle around the candidates outside and chant after school.


This article is satirical in nature.